Five Tips for Raising a Kind Kid

You might not think that kids are experiencing a kindness deficit these days with slogans like Kindness Matters and Choose Kind in the zeitgeist. However, a majority of parents believe that they are. In the Parents Value Study released by Parents magazine last fall, 76% of moms said kids are less kind today than in previous generations. Furthermore, 73% of moms identified kindness as the most important quality they hope to instill in their child. But, how do you raise a child to be kind and considerate of others? What are the behaviors and activities that will help to build that foundation? Here are some tips for intentionally nurturing kindness in your child. 

Encourage them to Connect

As we come out of a year when it has been so hard to connect with others, now is a great time to look for ways to intentionally reconnect to those around us. Kids can have a huge impact just by reaching out. Check with your local senior center to see if they are running any special programs to support seniors or suggest to your kids that they make time every day to check in with a phone call or a FaceTime to an elderly relative or neighbor to brighten their day.

Model Kindness and Volunteerism

Parents are a child’s first and most influential teachers. When they see you volunteering and helping others, that sends a strong message about what you value. If you are helping out a friend or neighbor or culling items from your kitchen for the local food pantry, involve them in those conversations and decisions so that they feel like active participants in helping others. When possible, volunteer to help out your child’s preschool or assistant coach for their soccer team so that they can see the positive impact that donating your time and energy can have. 

Meet the Helpers

There are so many members of the community whose work involves helping others: nurses, police, firefighters, librarians, food pantry workers, and animal shelter volunteers to name a few. Look for opportunities to introduce your child to the helpers in their community whose kindness makes our community a better place to live.  

What Can I Do to Help Others?

Encourage children to think about what they could contribute to helping others. During quarantine, many children learned how to sew masks to share with family and friends. Have a conversation about what people need right now. If your child has a green thumb, perhaps they could plant an extra tray of tomato plant seeds and deliver the plants to a neighbor or family member’s front steps in a few weeks. Get them thinking about what they could do to make their own unique contribution to a kinder community.

Point out how Kindness Feels

When kids are on the receiving end of a kind word or deed, those are powerful teachable moments. Take the time to point out and discuss those moments when they happen. Ask your child how it felt when they were included in a game, given a nice compliment, or someone offered help when they needed it. When kids develop an awareness of how kindness feels, they will start to see the impact that they can have on others when they reach out with kindness in return.